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Bloom Church -You Matters- Our desire is for you to bloom into the person God created you to be.
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Now displaying: Page 1
Feb 26, 2019

HEALTHY COUPLES FIGHT FOR RESOLUTION, UNHEALTHY COUPLES FIGHT FOR VICTORY. 

 

Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry,  for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires. James 1:19-20

 

SO HOW DO YOU FIGHT FAIR?

 

1. YOU HAVE TO STOP AND LISTEN.

 

A fool finds no pleasure in understanding but delights in airing his own opinions. Proverbs 18:2

 

STEPS TO LISTEN:

 

A. REPEAT BACK TO YOUR SPOUSE WHAT THEY JUST SAID.

 

B. VALIDATE EACH OTHERS’ FEELINGS.

 

2. GUARD YOUR WORDS.

 

Watch your tongue and keep your mouth shut, and you will stay out of trouble. Proverbs 21:23 NLT

 

ASK YOURSELF:

 

A. SHOULD IT BE SAID? 

 

B. SHOULD IT BE SAID NOW? 

 

RULES OF FIGHTING:

 

  • NEVER CALL NAMES.
  • NEVER RAISE YOUR VOICE
  • NEVER BRING UP THE PAST
  • NEVER SAY NEVER OR ALWAYS
  • NEVER THREATEN DIVORCE

 

  1. HANDLE YOUR ANGER RIGHTEOUSLY.

 

Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry... James 1:19

 In your anger do not sin. Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold. Ephesians 4:26-27

 

FOUR SIGNS YOU AREN’T FIGHTING FAIR:

 

  • CRITICISM VERSUS COMPLAINT. 
  • CONTEMPT 

 

  • DEFENSIVENESS

 

  • STONEWALLING

 

FINAL THOUGHTS

 

• DON’T REACT IN EMOTION, RESPOND IN THE SPIRIT. 

 

Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. Rom 12:21

 

• CONFRONT TO HEAL NEVER TO WIN.

 

Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. 1 Peter 3:8-10

 

FORGIVE. APOLOGIZE. 

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