When you are married will you have a goal to commit adultery?
Do you plan on getting addicted to porn?
How about having an emotional affair, you're not going to go all of the way, you're just going to give your heart to somebody else?
None of these are your goals!
Statistics say that well over half, closer to 75% of married couples will experience at least one or more of those things in their marriage.
Today we are going to learn how to defeat those odds.
Hebrews 13:4
Scripture says that purity matters to God & purity matters in your marriage.
Would you believe that 90% of Americans say adultery is wrong?? Only 90%?!
The University of California did a study & found that in just one decade between the years 1998 and 2008, the percentage of people committing adultery in our country had increased by over 50%.
Why is impurity increasing in marriages?
Because there are more temptations today
Facebook, instagram, snapchat... People meet old BF/GF on there & it just naturally starts something... Or they friend a girl and start Direct Messaging one another.
There are entire websites and apps devoted to helping people successfully cheat and have affairs discreetly. I cant even find an accurate weather app, but there are secret affair society apps to help you cheat!?
The biggest game changer in my opinion of temptation might be the smart phones and iPads and such. When I was a kid you had to sneak in and steal a magazine from one of your friends who had a dad who had a stash or go on the big family computer that sat out in the open and connected to that slow dial up... Now you have 24 hour access & can do it discreetly...
47% of American homes say that pornography is a problem in the home. Studies also show that pornography increases the chances of marital infidelity by 300%!
There's a growing sense of entitlement.
2 types of purity - inward and outward
1. Outward Purity: The Behavior
Ephesians 5:3
What is impurity? Basically, it's poison. We don't want any kind of poison in our marriage.
We are not just talking about having sex with someone that is not your spouse either...
looking a pornography... That’s a hint
Watching Magic Mike and lusting... That’s a hint
Dressing provocatively... That’s a hint
Watching inappropriate movies or reading inappropriate books... That’s a hint
Proverbs 5:8
Stay far away from the HINTS
1 Corinthians 6:18, 19-20
Flee! RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN! Because it will poison and destroy you...
I love the line where its says YOU ARE NOT YOUR OWN... Have you ever heard someone say “Its my body and I will do whatever I want” That is true when you are of this world, but when you are a follower of Jesus everything changes...
You were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.
You must create healthy boundaries in your marriage.
Fellas:
Im never alone with another girl, I don’t counsel girls without my wife, If some girl texts or emails me about a personal issue my wife is ALWAYS brought into the conversation,
Emails, FB messages, phone calls, etc of the opposite sex are never secret
My wife has all my passwords. She can get on my phone at anytime, Facebook, email, etc...
I have accountability partners that aren’t my wife...
LADIES:
That all of these apply to you too.
YOU MUST CREATE HEALTHY BOUNDARIES....
Pastor Craig Groeschel says “why resist a temptation tomorrow that you can eliminate today”
Don’t set yourself up for failure. Prepare yourself for success!
The biggest thing with boundaries is this though…
You cant rely on rules to protect your marriage!
Outward purity is effected by…
2. Inward Purity: The Heart
We don’t have the strength alone to be outwardly pure... We need a deeper strength that only comes from God or we will be destined to fail...
Psalm 119:9-11
David is saying the closer you get to God, the more he changes your heart. The closer you get to God the more disgusted you are towards sins that used to be something that drew you in
Matthew 5:28
The heart MATTERS!!!
Purity is less about NOT doing something and way more about doing something.
Purity is about positioning your heart and spirit in a place where that isn’t even appealing to you because its not honoring to God and its not honoring to your spouse and therefore its not honoring to your heart.
Three common responses to impurity:
1. Defensiveness
2. Remorse
3. Repentance
Repent and Don’t Give Up the Fight
You cant fully restore your marriage unless you are restored through the love and mercy of Jesus Christ.
If you have a spouse that repents, think about the courage it took. And I pray that their confession would be met with forgiveness and not judgment.
If you have been in a struggling marriage let this verse give you hope.
Galations 6:9
And if you are a struggling individual in here…
2 Chronicles 7:14
Remember purity is about action – HUMBLE themselves and pray…SEEK my face and turn from their ways of sin….I will restore their land